Reminders

 Everything is a reminder of the good state in my life right now. I have to let go and stop trying to control everything. Being vulnerable is so not my natural state. 

I have so much to do today so I probably shouldn't venture out too far into my head today. 

"I try to meditate, cause they told me it'll help

But the last thing I need is more time 8alone inside myself." -Icon for Hire

I feel that line so much. The more I'm in my head they less I make sense. I need to get back to writing all the ideas in my head. I need to get back to doing things that make me happy when I'm alone. Growth is weird because you're looking all the things you like and don't like about yourself, but sometimes have to keep going okay yes but  I need to make time for this too. 

Busy schedules are both great and sad. Its hard to find time for all the things and people in your life that you want to do. I've cut back as many things as I can as far as my volunteer work, and giving up the dog. I know I'm on the precipice of something freaking amazing, I just need to stop striving for control. I want happiness, I want freedom, and I want peace. 

Yesterday was awesome. I can't wait to spend more time just doing what we do. 

I need to plan some things but I need to focus today. Today is the day I do what he needs me to do, so we all breathe a little easier. 

Listening to the playlist you sent,

~Emi